Are You Dealing with Delays, Detours, Disappointments, and Dead-Ends While Waiting For Your Dreams To Crystalize?
As January morphed into February, two of my beloved clients showed up relapsing with fierce self-criticism and a “non-Relaxation Response” about all their unmet 2017 goals. They both lamented that having to write down those same commitments, hopes, and dreams into their 2018 calendars ONCE AGAIN confirms that they are indeed colossal failures.
First, there was Monique who felt extremely ashamed that she had not implemented any component of her business expansion plan that she so carefully crafted one year ago. Then Ellie proclaimed herself a “whimp,” as she never subtracted her top two Serenity Stealers of loneliness and keeping time with Mr. Wrong. Her intentions are to move to a lovely, nurturing community that feeds her longing to spend more time in Nature with like-minded others, plus trade in her current relationship with a very mediocre man for a true soul mate that she adores.
Yet, when I re-visited these particular goals with Monique and Ellie, they both confessed to not feeling “good enough” to manifest what they truly want, combined with waivering confusion as to exactly what is best for them. As opposed to embracing their fears and acknowledging the complexities of major work and lifestyle changes, Monique and Ellie succumbed to old habits of self-blame, as we all can, for their lack of progress, which creates paralysis and only gets us off the hook for the moment.
All acts of creativity are experiments. We jump into the unknown and test out hypotheses until we find our personal formula for success and satisfaction. We must continue taking baby steps and keep building on our insights and intuitive discoveries. We learn by doing, not by devaluing ourselves. Some dreams manifest quickly, while some initiatives seem to take forever and feel stuck or defy our best actions. These detours, delays, disappointments, and dead-ends, test our capacities for self-love and patience, and above all, our faith.
I came across a phenomenal quote a few months ago which I have been sharing with friends and clients and reading daily myself. It was written by Tao Te Ching who says:
“Do you have the patience to wait till your mud settles and the water clears? Can you remain unmoving till the right action arises by itself?”
Tao is talking about divine timing. Think back to times in your life when you thought you would lose your mind if things didn’t speed up and change for the better—and fast. Right action is an arm of divine timing. Learning to trust in right timing is a profound life lesson.
So when we create the conditions for what we are seeking to manifest through inspired actions, we send out signals to the Universe that can attract synchronicities and even miracles. By knowing what we truly want and not settling, then we may have to wait longer for all the chemistries to blend into the best formula. Each step in the process is vitally important and may take longer than we ever imagined.
As for Monique and Ellie, once they stopped copping out in the perilous land of self-blame, we were able to uncover some important choice points that they needed to ponder in order to refine the vision of what they truly want. Monique was able to admit that expanding her business terrified her. She was afraid that if she grew her business that she would become a stressed-out workaholic, with no leisure time for being with family and friends, or for cooking, which she adores. Her Dad was a successful entrepreneur who was never home and died young. These are real concerns which have to be grappled with before she can put her heart and soul into growing her business into one that also honors her desire for balance.
Ellie has not yet found a community that she feels drawn to and psyched about. So she has to review her vision and expand her search. She also realized that before she will be ready to let go of Mr. Wrong, her fantasy is to be moved, making new friends, and have someone teach her the basics of online dating. So preparation and compassion for ourselves are key to successful goal completion. So put down your whip and dig a little deeper, respect your fears and ambivalence, and manage your gremlins, so that you create the conditions for successful and meaningful change in sync with divine timing!
Here are two powerful questions to ask yourself right now:
If I felt completely comfortable and deserving of my visions for 2018:
What are the targeted experiments and/or ongoing actions that I need to take daily to forward my momentum?
What are my raw truths that I need to resolve and release in order to allow manifestation of my dreams?
I would love to hear from you with your answers! Hit reply and let me know your thoughts!
P.S. - We're holding our annual retreat again in August at Ferry Beach.
Deepen Your Connection to your Soul Wishes that Honor your Loving Heart and Spark New Clarity, Confidence and Commitment in your Life, using ongoing access to the Wisdom of SoulCollage® and Spiritual Autobiography with Gail McMeekin, LICSW, and Deborah Knox
This year’s conference theme is about Love. This workshop is designed for both new participants and last year’s group. Love is a key ingredient of living on a fulfilling Soul Path. What longings and wishes do you have that will help you to create a life that you love? Are you seeking new passions in your life? Do you need inspired answers to help you to tap into your creative potential, cultivate loving relationships, and receive guidance on how you are meant to serve? Are you longing to experience more self-love and share that love? Spend four days with Deborah Knox and Gail McMeekin, LICSW as they take you on a life-changing Soul Journey, which will spark your creativity, and help you to review and revise your life story into a new version that more truly reflects who you are. You can learn all about it here!